Bravo
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For those souls who watched last night’s ‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’ reunion show, this is what I must declare: Those polluted woman! This fighting was not therapeutical! I about spit out my imaginary sangwich and shaved my (non-hairy) face from my cheekbones to my neck when I saw those Housewives going at it like chow chows in a ring! It is time for them to re-renovate their anger management skills!
Topics of conversation ranged from: Uncongratulated babies! Defamation of the English language! Gag order on Dina! Fertility ingratitude! Dead-eyed children! Teresa’s financial fiasco! Danielle’s dive into the lady pond! Sex tapes! And charity events with no charity! Oh, what didn’t Hostess with the Mostess Andy Cohen cover in part uno of this unholy reunion?!
While I’m dying to go through every single moment that made Tropical Storm Danielle squint her eyes and suck in her cheeks, I shall only allow my pea-sized heart to palpitate through the main highlights (i.e. outbursts) that mostly likely possessed Caroline to lose 25 lbs. and Mr. Cohen to wear that shiny silk purple tie! Here we go, ladies and germies! Read More »
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Rats! There are rats up in the ‘Jersey Shore,’ yo! Who wrote the anonymous note to Sammi that reveals Ron makes out with fat chicks in the club? And who has the intellectual skills to include the advanced SAT word ‘wisely’ when warning her? But never mind that. The real question is if the typed-out revelation is enough for Sam to wake-the-freak-up from her emotional disease of loving a five-foot-tall wandering-eyed Koopa Troopa!
Let’s recap the highlights and find out what happens!
Three Chicks, One Grenade
The Situation definitely has a situation when he, Vinny, and Pauly D bring home two “hot” chicks and two others show up knocking at their door—one of which he refers to as a “hippopotamus.” The Three Amigos huddle together to see if they can manage to come up with one intelligent idea of how to deal with four felines in heat, one being from The Discovery Channel, mind you. The result? “I will extract the hot one and leave the grenade to blow up Ronnie’s room by herself,” The Situation whispers as his homeboys high-five him.
In the end, the plan works, and their pipers get paid. Read More »
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Bravo
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Guess that trip to Italy didn’t help the Danielle Staub Hate Train to chug any slower. If you thought the ‘Real Housewives of NYC’ reunion show was pretty explosive, be prepared to flip over your dining room table at the nightmare that is the ‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’ reunion!
Although we don’t know if things got physical, you better believe Teresa Giudice wanted her body to do the talking. At one point, Caroline Manzo and Bravo host Andy Cohen had to stand up to block the bankrupt reality star from unleashing her ‘Patterson’ on Danielle, according to People.com.
“They were ready to go and they were ready to put it all out on the table” says one source and adds that the early madness is “tame” compared to what ensues later in the two-part reunion.
So what does Mr. Cohen have to say? “This might be the best reunion we’ve ever done. You won’t believe how it starts and you won’t believe how it ends.”
Part 1 of the reunion show airs on August 30 (10pm ET) followed by Part 2 on September 6 (9pm ET).
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